Marrying Unbelievers
2 Cor 6:14-16
14 Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? 15 And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever? 16 And what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For you are the temple of the living God. As God has said:
“I will dwell in them, And walk among them.
I will be their God, And they shall be My people.” NKJV
If you want to have a lot of pain and suffering in your life, the best thing you can do is marry an unbeliever. I have seen so many believers be abused by an unsaved spouse; whether it be mentally, physically, and especially sexually (ie. withholding themselves). I highly recommend staying single over marrying an unbeliever. If you are a single and you love God, find someone like you. Pray for God to arrange the divine appointment for you to meet with that person. Take your time, don’t be in a hurry. You can even ask Godly men and women what they they think of that person’s temperament.
When you are marrying an unbeliever you are subjecting yourself to a relationship that is going to be very hard. “Oh, but Pastor I am believing for him to be saved”, some may say. If you think you are going to get a person interested in you to sincerely repent and turn to God when their emotions are clouded by feelings for you, you are gravely mistaken. Don’t do it. Don’t marry an unbeliever. God has something better for you. If you really love that person, pray that God will send believers across their path so that they will hear the news of the Kingdom and repent on their own. If you are already married to an unbeliever, don’t be down… more about that in a moment.
When I was in high school I started praying for my wife to be. I didn’t know who she was. I prayed for a woman with a great personality, a lady that would look good without makeup, a believer that had a passion for God. Three years after graduation from High School I married a beautiful lady. Our first meeting was a get together with a friend of my sister. It was not a date so there was no pressure for anyone to act anything but normal. I likely her bubbly personality, her love for the Lord, besides she looked very cute in a skirt! I was attracted to her. As I was visiting Tokyo, the second day I saw her I asked for her address so that I could write her when she returned to her Bibleschool in the Los Angeles area and I returned to the Seattle area.
We were pretty pathetic letter writers. (Thank God for email these days!). However, after a year I couldn’t get her off of my mind. I started calling her from my home in Washington to her place in California. When calls were not enough, we started visiting each other via airplane. She met my family. I was young, but I took her up to a little Mountain called Mt. Pete near Enumclaw Washington and asked her to marry me at the top of that mountain. I was so nervous! She agreed and we married in January 1989.
It was a wonderful match as we both had a relationship with Yahweh before we even knew each other. We were committed to Him first so we could be committed to each other. Even though we were from different cultures from a national perspective, we were actually the same culture because we were both Kingdom Kids.
We have been through a lot in our marriage. We started with nothing and now we are blessed. We were told we could not have children but now we have three that have a passion for Him and help us as we minister. God is so good to us. When we married, we united to create a legacy. I am excited about what God has in store. If one of us would have been a unbeliever, I am sure we would have not made it. Why? The core of our marriage is not each other, or even just ‘’love”. The core of our marriage is a love based on the One who loved us, Jesus.
If you are already married to an unbeliever, pray for the Holy Spirit to draw that person to Yahweh. Pray that wherever they go they will run into Bible-believing, Spirit-filled Christians. Get your extended family (father, mother, sisters, brothers) to be praying for this as well.
If you are not married yet, don’t get in a hurry. A marriage to the wrong person can be horrible. Meet other believers like you in group settings. Meet them at church (usually the safest place, but you still need to always check), church events, and other meetings that center on your relationship with the King. When you meet people in a group setting you can usually see what they are really like. Unfortunately, when you ‘date’ people, you and them are usually trying to put the best foot forward and you can’t always see who they really are.
If you are going to hook up with someone for this lifelong commitment, make sure you follow the Word’s advice… Don’t marry unbelievers. Behind repenting and coming into the Kingdom, it is the second most important decision of your life.
Faith Buiders- © 2010, Ps. Spencer Patrick- Victory Word Church- http://www.victoryword.org
